Updated: Mar 2
What is your favourite word? Luminescence - the emission of light from a cold substance. The word gives me good imagery.
What is your least favourite word? Anemone - It’s a plant under the sea and I think I heard it from a Disney movie. The character had a hard time pronouncing it and since then I hated the word.
What turns you on? When people are able and willing to be vulnerable to others, I believe those people have better character.
What turns you off? Insecurity, which is different from low self-esteem. We all feel down about ourselves at some point in our lives, but insecurity is something that is destructive. Insecure people hurt inside themselves, and they are willing to hurt the people around them.
What is your idea of perfect happiness? Currently? I believe what makes you happy changes all the time. At the moment, I want to be in a middle of nowhere with no sense of time, no plans, and no pains…and with a dog.
You mentioned pain, are you in pain right now? Yes, everyday. I have Multiple Sclerosis (MS). I was diagnosed in November 2014. I still remember it was on Black Friday.
What made you decide to seek a doctor that day? I woke up one morning, and I could not feel my legs or arms. I realized that I took these things for granted, you do not wake up and not have limbs suddenly. I had been feeling different symptoms for a while at that time. My brother and I waited in the ER for a long time that night, they did not do anything initially.
What did you feel when the doctor told you that you have Multiple Sclerosis? I was giving myself hope the day I was diagnosed that it was not MS, because I knew what was about to happen. I was hoping it wasn’t, when I started feeling these symptoms I Googled it and Cancer is usually a standard result, but MS always came up. When the doctor told me it was MS, I did not cry at first. I asked about my baby sister first, she is 8 years old today. I asked if it was possible for her to get it as well. They said it was a possibility. I wanted to know if I could do something to prevent her from getting it.
Did you ever ask the question on why you have to suffer from this condition? Of course I went through that, but now I realize that you’re not given a struggle if you can’t handle it. Maybe at the time you think you can’t, but I believe that you can. I am not angry as I am before. Living with MS offended a lot of people around me that do not understand what I am going through. Perspective.
Let’s say you’re in a big room full of people and you’ve been given the opportunity to share one message, what would it be? Be grateful. I want to teach people how to live without being selfish.
What is your current state of mind? I want to remind myself to be at peace and tell myself to be happy which I am, but it’s hard-work.
Which living person do you most admire? I find that difficult to answer. There’s not one person that I can say I admire. Rather, different people amongst different situations inspire me.
What do you consider as your greatest achievement? My independence. I love my family, but I feel good doing everything by myself. I never ask my parents for anything or for money. But I feel exhausted.
If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? Be more patient with situations. There are days when I have high energy and days when I don’t.
If heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? This is a tough one. I was supposed to have a baby several years back, but I lost her. My grandfather died 8 years ago as well. When I get there, I hope God will say, “They are waiting inside for you.”